Dedicated to the fine folk of Drain, OR, and especially to Krista's Aunt Jan and whomever it was who was shopping the garage sale yesterday.
Jan: How is your garage sale-ing going?
Shopper: Great. I can't have fish in our pond because the raccoons eat them, but I bought some lilies for the pond.
Jan: The raccoons eat them, huh?
Shopper: Yes. We have some "live traps"... but did you know that if you take a racoon fifty miles away it will still get back to your house within a day.
Jan: They are pretty devoted to their territory.
Shopper: Yes. You can't kill them in town, you know, so we catch them in the live traps and take them out to "The Buzzard Buffet." (She makes a gun with her fingers and mimes shooting a raccoon.) That's why I say... it's a "live" trap.
Jan: How is your garage sale-ing going?
Shopper: Great. I can't have fish in our pond because the raccoons eat them, but I bought some lilies for the pond.
Jan: The raccoons eat them, huh?
Shopper: Yes. We have some "live traps"... but did you know that if you take a racoon fifty miles away it will still get back to your house within a day.
Jan: They are pretty devoted to their territory.
Shopper: Yes. You can't kill them in town, you know, so we catch them in the live traps and take them out to "The Buzzard Buffet." (She makes a gun with her fingers and mimes shooting a raccoon.) That's why I say... it's a "live" trap.
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