I don't want to Boar you

Today marks the beginning of our national leadership meetings for the campus ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ. I'm down in Orlandoooooooo, Florida with my boss, Keith Bubalo, and a great big gaggle of my friends and co-workers.

Here's a picture of the last time I was with Keith, in a restaurant in Germany earlier this month. As you can see in the picture, it's me, Keith and a boar. I will let you try to figure out which of us is which.

NOW, for some fun for all of you while I am in meetings today: put your best caption for the photo above in the comments!

Now's Your Chance to See the Cover of Night of the Living Dead Christian

Here it is, the cover to Night of the Living Dead Christian. I sent out a sneak peek to all the newsletter subscribers on Wednesday. Here's what it looked like (you can sign up in the column on the right).

Here's the official facebook page.

It's hard to express how pleased I am with this cover. It definitely exceeded my expectations, and turned out better than my original pitch, which was a church in the background with a bloody chainsaw in the foreground. I was kidding. Mostly.

Huge props to the Tyndale design team. Well done.

In the near future we'll see about getting some more goodies related to the book out to you all. But in the meantime you can mark the release date in October-ish and make all your wishes that summer would just go away and get straight to fall so you can get this book in your hot little hands.

Okay. Back to work you lackeys.

Eavesdropping with Matt (Episode Forty-Eight: Take It from Me, Parents Just Don't Understand)

This episode of Eavesdropping with Matt is dedicated to the two lovely women who are the secretaries at the office of our children's doctor. 

Secretary #1: I don't know why everyone insists on trying to schedule things with Dr. J. She has a family of her own and her schedule is less flexible.

Secretary #2: I know. It's like people think a doctor will be better with kids just because she has kids.

Secretary #1: That's what the lady I just spoke to said. She wants Dr. J because Dr. J has kids.

Secretary #2: I don't see why parents think that having kids can make someone a better doctor for kids.

AND NOW, using my amazing psychic powers I will reveal something about both secretaries. It's getting clearer. It's getting clearer. I've got it! Neither of them has children. They are far too reasonable. TA-DA! Please feel free to shower me with applause.


Here's a link to more Eavesdropping With Matt from months and years past.

Wonderful Wednesday: Gospel of the Trees

My friend Darren showed me this yesterday.

It's the Gospel of the Trees, a website that has pictures, poems and scripture all related to trees. I think you'll like it.

And now, here's a cartoon about trees. If we didn't have trees, we wouldn't have this excellent cartoon:

There would be some other problems too.

Just leave me alone, I'm reading a book!

I'm pretty sure that this is my daughter's theme song:



I got this from Jesse Doogan, whose blog you are going to want to watch closely next week during the special ALL IMAGINARY JESUS week of splendor.

Wonderful Wednesday: Gil Kane's The Flame Horse

My friend Alan sent me this a couple of weeks ago. Let's be honest, everyone wants to read this. I want to see that guy on the white horse fight the skull guy. And I sincerely hope that some of the alien spaceships get involved.

Sadly, I can't find any evidence that this comic was ever made.

NOW... stop your crying and enjoy what little we have of Gil Kane's The Flame Horse!

Imaginary Jesus: FATAL ALLIANCE ON DUNE WITH THE ROUGH BEASTS OF EMPIRE!!!!!!

One of the things I like about Amazon is when the book gets to certain ranks (it was in the low 6,000s today!), they compare the book to other books in the same genre.

Of course, no one seems to be able to figure out what genre Imaginary Jesus belongs to, so it ends up in categories like this one: Science Fiction Adventure! In which IJ dukes it out with Star Trek, Star Wars and Dune.

Now, if only I could get six or twelve Imaginary Jesus movies and a television series or two under my belt, I think IJ would have a fighting chance.

Harry Potter! Now you've turned my own children against me!

I was talking with my father-in-law this weekend about Imaginary Jesus, and he asked if there would be another printing, and I told him that the next printing will be the third printing. Which is pretty awesome. I walked into the kitchen, and Z. walked up to me and said:

Z: Dad, can you imagine how many printings there have been of Harry Potter?

Me: I know. A lot.

Z: Yes. Because everyone loves Harry Potter.

My favorite Romantic movies for Valentine's Day #1: George of the Jungle

You probably think I'm joking, but this is one of my favorite movies of all time. It's appropriate for all ages, it's funny and it has a sweet love story. And let's be honest, any love story that starts with the hero accidentally knocking out the heroine while saving her from a lion, after which he sniffs her hair and says, "Funny looking fella" is going to be a classic.

A tragic love story from Thailand in honor of Valentine's Day

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

You fool! If only you had upgraded the roof of your porch... *sniff* And now... it is too late.

A Valentine's Video from Jamie Carie

My friend Jamie Carie is a Romance Novelist. Yes, it's true. She's sending out strong Valentine's vibes today, including this video with quotes from her book. I thought you might enjoy it. So here you go:

Do you ever feel like someone is lurking behind you, watching your every move and waiting to POUNCE?

Sometimes I like to sneak up behind people who are getting their picture taken and insert myself into the scenery. Surprise!

Wonderful Wednesday: The Smoking Flying Stallion of Vintage Japan

If you smoke Peacock Cigarettes, you'll feel like you're riding a  leathery winged horse
out of the smoking ruins of a well-lined globe.

It's hard not love this advertisement. The more I look at it, the more I love it. I don't know who it is targeting, with the creepy, bat-winged horse who is smoking a big cigarette while flying over a burning world-globe. Then add the fact that the strange horror horse is the mascot of a cigarette brand called "Peacock" and what's not to love?

I get to see this a lot because Amy, one of my excellent co-workers, has a copy of this over her desk.

Jet Lag

Jet lag is usually the worst on day 2, at least in my experience. You wake up tired and can't go back to sleep, at a time of the morning when you should be blissfully snoring on your back.

This morning I probably would have slept through the "danger zone" in which if you wake up, you stay awake, except that the baby hit her head on something in her crib and started to cry. She, of course, went back to sleep. I lay in bed and tried to stay in bed and eventually got up. Which means that I woke Krista up, although she stayed in bed and tried to overcome it.

Jet lag also means that you will laugh at insane things that would usually pass by uncommented, like when someone close to you says, "Is this an animal show?" or "animal attraction" or something like that. I know, I know, there is nothing funny about these things. Intellectually I know this. But my jet lagged mind finds them hysterically funny. I am laughing right now.  Ha ha! No one has actually said those things, by the way. I'm just saying that if they did, I would find it funny.

Speaking of which... lack of coherence is also a problem. Sigh.

Okay, it's now close enough to my regular wake up time that I think I will go eat some Honey Nut Cheerios.

If you see me asleep or napping today, or if you catch me staring off into space with a glassy look in my eyes, poke e in the side wmill you?

Get Imaginary Jesus FREE FOR YOUR E-READER

For a limited time you can get the e-book version of Imaginary Jesus ABSOLUTELY FREE in Kindle format, for the Nook, or for your Sony e-reader.

Yes, my friends, the same book that was described as startling, contemporary, meaningful (Publisher's Weekly) and that Relevant Magazine compared to "Monty Python meets C.S. Lewis" is FREE.

I'd appreciate it if you'd let your friends know about this...  the more people who know about this the better, so please feel free to download it in multiple formats, send links to your friends, post, facebook, tweet, blog and hire sky writers. Muchas gracias mi amigos!

Homeward Bound

We're on our way home from Spain, staying the night in Germany. Here's what happened the last time I stayed in Germany. I hope to be able to send you excellent updates from this, my second overnight stay in Germany.

Sweet dreams everyone.

ROBIN and also Mary Marvel

From the imagination, pen and website of the always charming Colleen Coover:

Rawr!

Iz not safe, but Iz good. (from 9GAG)

Wonderful Wednesday: The Alhambra

Krista and I are in Spain right now, very near to Granada and the amazing Moorish castle, the Alhambra. Here's a video about the Alhambra from Rick Steves which I think you'll enjoy.

THE EARTH IS ABOUT TO GET A SECOND SUN!!!

This is a band called Supernova.

Scientists have recently announced that the Earth is going to get a second sun when the star Betelgeuse goes SUPERNOVA!  The explosion will be so bright that it could make the nighttime sky nearly as bright as the daytime sky, and this could last for several weeks. Brad Carter, an astronomer, says that it will happen soon... as early as THIS YEAR and as late as a million years from now.

My first car was a Nova.

This is a superhero named Nova.

This is Nova making eyes at an alien chick with a knife.
Soon -- maybe later this year, maybe a
million years from now -- Nova is going to regret this.

NOW YOU: In the comments, make a list of things that may happen as early as this year and as late as a million years from now. You know, stuff like this:

1) Gardens will be planted on the moon!
2) Robots will destroy all human life!
3) Robots will raise the intelligence of dogs so that they can serve their robot masters!
4) Dogs will overthrow and destroy all robots!

Get to it! Before the supernova!