Since summer is rapidly approaching, I thought it might be time for some travel tips. It's been some time since I shared any, so here are a few:
1) Cell phone signals are completely designed to drive people mad. They say, "Oh, I have four bars" or "I have full bars." Yeah, right. It doesn't matter. The phone still won't be able to make a call. A raincloud will block the magic wireless signal. A raccoon will sneeze and distract the Cell Phone technology. The only way that cell phone companies make full bars is when they drive people to drink. TIP: Be sure to write an angry letter to your phone company before you travel, then you can sign and send it in at your leisure.
2) It's really hard to tell how nice a hotel is online. Especially if by nice you mean "clean, no bed bugs, under $100". You might, for instance, arrive at your hotel to discover that it's in the back of a parking lot behind "Romantix Erotic Toys" and "Lotty's Restaurant, Lounge, and Liquor Store." You might also discover that the NO SMOKING signs on your floor are largely ignored. On the bright side, there are no bed bugs (you can check this by lifting the sheets and looking for tiny pinprick blood stains on the mattress). TIP: Bolt the door.
3) If the Department of Transportation thinks to install a permanent sign that says "Severe Weather Warning Next 20 Miles" you should expect to experience some severe weather. Don't say things like, "I think we're going to beat the storm" when you see the cinematically dramatic black clouds zeroing in on you. Also, when the HAIL starts to beat your car like a drum at mile 21, realize that this is because you said you were going to beat the storm. TIP: When the visibility drops to two feet because of the thick hail and the road is flooded and you can't see the dividing lines on the road anymore, feel free to roll down your window if it helps you to see better. DO NOT however, stick your face out the window, especially if you are going 75 MPH. This will hurt.
4) I understand the deeply felt need to go to a gas station that has a name like "SMOKER'S FRIEND." But you should know in your heart that it will not be worth it. TIP: If a surly attendant comes over to pump your gas or something, don't say, "Hey, a good slogan for your gas station would be LIGHT UP BEFORE YOU FILL UP." He is cranky enough already.
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
Friday, May 29, 2009
Death of a Cell Phone
While in Hawaii I ran down to the beach to see a Ilio-holo-i-ka-uaua (that's a Hawaiian monk seal to all you mainlanders). The Hawaiian monk seals are one of the most endangered seals in the world, with less than 2,000 alive today. Anyway, one was hanging out at the beach and I wanted to see it.
The kids were not particularly impressed. Z said -- with the detachment of some delphic oracle -- "It looks dead to me." And she was right that it looked that way. Krista took some pictures in which the seal appears to have expired on the beach, and the yellow tape put up to keep people from harassing the seal makes it look like a crime scene.
It also meant that to get to the other side of the seal you had to wade through the surf to come up on the other side. Since I hadn't planned to run to the beach to see an endangered seal, I had carried my cell phone down with me. But, being a genius I knew to hold it in my hand so I could lift it up and over any waves that might crash upon me.
As I passed around the edge of the crime scene tape I noticed two giant turtles in the surf. Which of course I needed to see more closely. So I walked closer and was amazed. They are incredible creatures. And then, as if in slow motion, a wave gathered strength and slapped me five right in the cell-phone-carrying hand.
NOOOOOOOO! And it immediately shut down. It lost all signs of life. It looked, for all intents and purposes, precisely like a Hawaiian monk seal.
I took out the battery, of course, and dried it out, and kept plugging it in to see if it would work. But no luck. Lights come on, but the screen is just a glowing blankness. It can send and receive phone calls... if it's plugged in. So it's now a land line, I guess. I feel completely crippled having a phone that you just pick up and dial in a number and make a call. One other issue... the phone was on vibrate at the time of the incident, and it won't switch over to audio. So that means that it's like a land line that only jiggles instead of ringing.
I went to the Verizon cell phone people today and the guy asked me "Did you put it in a bowl of ice?"
Ice? What?
"A bowl of rice," he said. To pull the moisture out. Oh. Nope, didn't do that.
So now it's too late. Phone = dead. I'm a year into my contract with no insurance so I can buy a "cheap" phone on a one year contract (cheap meaning only a hundred dollars instead of $150 or whatever the sale is today) or switch over to an old phone.
So I switched back to my original phone. The one I had for four years. The one I dropped in a toilet and it still worked. The one that is so old it doesn't work with Bluetooth.
Which leads me to these questions:
1) Does anyone have an old Verizon compatible phone they're trying to get rid of? Not as old as the one I am using right now, preferably.
2) Anyone out there use some sort of phone resale/buying site? One where I won't get ripped off?
3) Do you think it would be weird for me to stand outside the Verizon wireless store with a sign that said I WILL BUY YOUR OLD PHONE FOR $20 IF IT WORKS!
The kids were not particularly impressed. Z said -- with the detachment of some delphic oracle -- "It looks dead to me." And she was right that it looked that way. Krista took some pictures in which the seal appears to have expired on the beach, and the yellow tape put up to keep people from harassing the seal makes it look like a crime scene.
It also meant that to get to the other side of the seal you had to wade through the surf to come up on the other side. Since I hadn't planned to run to the beach to see an endangered seal, I had carried my cell phone down with me. But, being a genius I knew to hold it in my hand so I could lift it up and over any waves that might crash upon me.
As I passed around the edge of the crime scene tape I noticed two giant turtles in the surf. Which of course I needed to see more closely. So I walked closer and was amazed. They are incredible creatures. And then, as if in slow motion, a wave gathered strength and slapped me five right in the cell-phone-carrying hand.
NOOOOOOOO! And it immediately shut down. It lost all signs of life. It looked, for all intents and purposes, precisely like a Hawaiian monk seal.
I took out the battery, of course, and dried it out, and kept plugging it in to see if it would work. But no luck. Lights come on, but the screen is just a glowing blankness. It can send and receive phone calls... if it's plugged in. So it's now a land line, I guess. I feel completely crippled having a phone that you just pick up and dial in a number and make a call. One other issue... the phone was on vibrate at the time of the incident, and it won't switch over to audio. So that means that it's like a land line that only jiggles instead of ringing.
I went to the Verizon cell phone people today and the guy asked me "Did you put it in a bowl of ice?"
Ice? What?
"A bowl of rice," he said. To pull the moisture out. Oh. Nope, didn't do that.
So now it's too late. Phone = dead. I'm a year into my contract with no insurance so I can buy a "cheap" phone on a one year contract (cheap meaning only a hundred dollars instead of $150 or whatever the sale is today) or switch over to an old phone.
So I switched back to my original phone. The one I had for four years. The one I dropped in a toilet and it still worked. The one that is so old it doesn't work with Bluetooth.
Which leads me to these questions:
1) Does anyone have an old Verizon compatible phone they're trying to get rid of? Not as old as the one I am using right now, preferably.
2) Anyone out there use some sort of phone resale/buying site? One where I won't get ripped off?
3) Do you think it would be weird for me to stand outside the Verizon wireless store with a sign that said I WILL BUY YOUR OLD PHONE FOR $20 IF IT WORKS!
Welcome Back!
We took an overnight flight home from Hawaii last night, which means we landed in LA before 5 and then dragged our way north to Oregon by ten or so.
The kids wanted to go to school because they missed their friends, so I walked them down there. Z's class was having recess, and they came running toward the fence yelling, "Z's back! Z's back!"
One little girl said, "We missed you, Z!"
Another said, "Did you have fun in Hawaii?"
A little boy asked, "Did you see any hot babes in bikinis?"
The kids wanted to go to school because they missed their friends, so I walked them down there. Z's class was having recess, and they came running toward the fence yelling, "Z's back! Z's back!"
One little girl said, "We missed you, Z!"
Another said, "Did you have fun in Hawaii?"
A little boy asked, "Did you see any hot babes in bikinis?"
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Chapter Six is now behind me
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
CANE TOADS
Last night Krista, her dad and I drove along the Waimea canyon and hit the top right as the sun was setting. It was gorgeous.
On the way down through the Hawaiian dusk and near the end of our trip down from the canyon I saw some little animals on the road ahead... I thought maybe some small birds (there are mourning doves in abundance here). But no... it was hundreds of cane toads. They practically covered the road, it was like a plague of cane toads. I tried to miss them with the car as much as possible. One toad that I missed by driving directly over it jumped and hit the car's under carriage.
Cane toads were introduced to Hawaii to eat beetles that were killing sugar cane. Then they started growing out of control. They have little poison sacs behind their eyes that kill predators that eat them, too, so they've been successful in killing more than just beetles.
We jumped out of the car and took a couple of pictures of these monster toads. But you couldn't get too close or they would take a running start and then jump off the road.
On the way down through the Hawaiian dusk and near the end of our trip down from the canyon I saw some little animals on the road ahead... I thought maybe some small birds (there are mourning doves in abundance here). But no... it was hundreds of cane toads. They practically covered the road, it was like a plague of cane toads. I tried to miss them with the car as much as possible. One toad that I missed by driving directly over it jumped and hit the car's under carriage.
Cane toads were introduced to Hawaii to eat beetles that were killing sugar cane. Then they started growing out of control. They have little poison sacs behind their eyes that kill predators that eat them, too, so they've been successful in killing more than just beetles.
We jumped out of the car and took a couple of pictures of these monster toads. But you couldn't get too close or they would take a running start and then jump off the road.
THE END
The Plot Thickens! (Mystery on the web, part 2)
I know you, My Loyal Minions--who know much more about the internet than I-- say that there is no real mystery related to lame.org.
But I just want to point out that today (Memorial Day) someone from Alpharetta, Georgia visited that page FIFTY-FOUR TIMES. I mean, I know some of you are Big Fans and like to visit often (which I heartily encourage), but even I must admit that's a little extreme. In fact, the precise page they visited was this one, which it looks like to me that maybe they were trying to hack my comments editor (?!). In addition, if I look up the Alpharetta, GA visitor on a map function for the stats it shows their location off the west coast of Africa. Huh?
Okay, okay... this person also came referred from my facebook page... so they are probably reading this right now. REVEAL YOURSELF O PERSON FROM ALPHARETTA! Yes, even hackers are welcome here (yes, even you, Mister Uno).
As for you minions, I have the person's ip address, so I can email it to you and then you can do your Internet Voodoo and tell me again how there's no mystery!
But I just want to point out that today (Memorial Day) someone from Alpharetta, Georgia visited that page FIFTY-FOUR TIMES. I mean, I know some of you are Big Fans and like to visit often (which I heartily encourage), but even I must admit that's a little extreme. In fact, the precise page they visited was this one, which it looks like to me that maybe they were trying to hack my comments editor (?!). In addition, if I look up the Alpharetta, GA visitor on a map function for the stats it shows their location off the west coast of Africa. Huh?
Okay, okay... this person also came referred from my facebook page... so they are probably reading this right now. REVEAL YOURSELF O PERSON FROM ALPHARETTA! Yes, even hackers are welcome here (yes, even you, Mister Uno).
As for you minions, I have the person's ip address, so I can email it to you and then you can do your Internet Voodoo and tell me again how there's no mystery!
Monday, May 25, 2009
Guest Blogger
You may have noticed the four posts below from my lovely wife, Krista. I had used her computer the other day so when she signed on to do her blog it posted to BHR instead! I've copied the content to her blog, now, and as always you can see her great photos and insights at Blue Sky.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Boogie Board Discovery
I remember when I discovered the sheer pleasure of riding a boogie board in California. Z. made this same discovery and has insisted that her day be filled with time in the ocean everyday- no matter how sunburned she was. There doesn't seem to be much point in washing her hair because she will just end up back in the ocean with sand crusted onto her hair.
First Day in Hawaii
Our first day in Hawaii the kids indulged in lots of sand castle building time and did a little swimming in a lagoon area. The next it was clear that their skin needed more than just sunscreen. Within a few days they both had long sleeved swim shirts and a new array of sunblock. The beaches are beautiful and even though I'm not able to do all the usual adventure stuff- hiking and lots of ocean swimming- I'm enjoying the sunshine and ocean and a comfy place to read.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Ooops
Today I drove by the beach where my wife was, and I hung my head out the window and whistled at her.
But she didn't hear me.
The person who did hear me was the beefy guy facing the street, who was getting his muscles oiled up by his little girlfriend. He was not pleased with my whistling. He stared me down and watched as I drove away.
Oops.
But she didn't hear me.
The person who did hear me was the beefy guy facing the street, who was getting his muscles oiled up by his little girlfriend. He was not pleased with my whistling. He stared me down and watched as I drove away.
Oops.
Boogie Boarding
Here's me boogie boarding at Poipu Beach yesterday. I'm planning to go again today. While I was further out a giant sea turtle came up to investigate and waved a big leathery fin at me. It was about ten feet away, which was cool.
The kids had fun, too, though they eventually gave up after multiple dunkings. If you look at the picture below you can see A on the left, smiling and laughing at a brownish lump in the surf toward the right side of the picture. That would be the top of Z's head.
Here's a picture of Z's hair after being rubbed several times into the ocean floor yesterday morning.
But as you can see she was still having fun.
I got bounced pretty hard a couple times myself... I went out further after the kids gave up. One time a really huge wave was right on top of me and I couldn't decide whether to go for it or go over it and then it broke right on top of my head. It was like getting a trip to the chiropractor and using a netti pot all at once. It was a lot of fun.
Anyway, I should get off the internet and go do something on the beach. Later!
Friday, May 22, 2009
This Is Where I Live
This is a picture from under my palm tree on Poipu Beach. You can see a shadow from one of the fronds of my palm tree. You can see the ocean immediately in front of my palm tree. You might think that this picture looks overly blue, but I assure you it is, in fact, not blue enough. You may also notice that the horizon looks skewed to one side and think, that place does not look so great, it looks like it is tipped over and the ocean is going to run off to the side. This is, in fact, an optical illusion caused by the fact that I am sitting so lazily in my beach chair that I cannot be bothered to hold my cell phone straight long enough to snap a picture. Besides, I don't want to have to put my book down.
In other news, I am renting out week-long shifts under my palm tree for a paltry sum. You can go to a cheap luau if you agree to sit with me for 90 minutes and let me try to sell it to you.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
The Big Easy
We're in Hawaii and having a good time. Today we decided it was time to introduce the kids to boogie boarding. I rented two boards, one with a hard bottom and one that is basically just a slab of foam. The kids, of course, started to immediately fight over them before they even got to the water, the deciding factor being... the colors.
Me: Let's get them down to the water and you can both try them out and decide which one you think is the most fun.
Z: I want to see which one is easiest.
Me: Easiest? Wouldn't you rather find out which one was the most fun even if it was a little more work?
A: I WANT THE ONE THAT'S THE MOST FUN!
Z (skeptically): I guess.
Me: Let's get them down to the water and you can both try them out and decide which one you think is the most fun.
Z: I want to see which one is easiest.
Me: Easiest? Wouldn't you rather find out which one was the most fun even if it was a little more work?
A: I WANT THE ONE THAT'S THE MOST FUN!
Z (skeptically): I guess.
Monday, May 18, 2009
News from my neighborhood: THE STREETS OF LIZARDO!
Walking the kids home from school today we realized that as people rounded the front edge of our lawn they would give out a high pitched cry of alarm.
This is because the foot-long reptile at left had cozied up into the daisys and would poke his creepy bearded head out as people walked by.
Of course the neighborhood banded together and honorary neighbor Ken The Conquerer documented the capture of the lizard here on video . It's well worth your time to see our neighbor April, who was right in the middle of dieing her hair, show up and catch the lizard single-handedly.
Z said she would name it "Freak."
But when the owner eventually showed up he said the real name was "Dynamite."
About an hour after the owner recovered the lizard he showed up again asking if we had seen it. I'm so glad we returned the lizard to the idiotic owner instead of taking it to animal control as had been the original plan.
And now an ode in song (to the tune of "Streets of Laredo"):
As I walked down on the streets of Lizardo
As I walked out in Lizardo one day
I spied a young dragon
all dressed in his skivvies
all dressed in scaled skin
naked as a jay
We sat down beside him
and took us some pictures
we caught him in a bucket
and taped it right up
we held him for his owner
we blogged all about it
we took us his freedom
and that was enough.
THE END
Saturday, May 16, 2009
A Mystery
On a whim I decided a few moments ago to randomly type in a web address and see where it took me. I started with "boring.com." I didn't know what I would find. I thought, it could be something wonderful. Maybe someone made a sort of playground on the internet and named it "Boring" so only the odd occasional wanderer like myself would come and visit.
But that's not what happened: Boring.com
That's the home of Boring Business Systems. So, since that's probably someone's last name I won't make fun of it. Because, as my boss Keith says, "People with names like ours should not make fun of the names of others." Excellent advice, Mr. Bubalo.
Buuuuut, excited by the possibilities of typing in something strange and finding a wonderful new something, I decided to try again. So I went to lame.org and I discovered something mysterious.
There was a note.
And it said:
But that's not what happened: Boring.com
That's the home of Boring Business Systems. So, since that's probably someone's last name I won't make fun of it. Because, as my boss Keith says, "People with names like ours should not make fun of the names of others." Excellent advice, Mr. Bubalo.
Buuuuut, excited by the possibilities of typing in something strange and finding a wonderful new something, I decided to try again. So I went to lame.org and I discovered something mysterious.
There was a note.
And it said:
What are you doing?
There's noting to see here.
Your connection has been logged.
Notice the grey, almost faded font. Also notice the word "nothing" has been misspelled... as if to say that there actually IS something to see here. And then the threat that my connection has been logged.
I think that there is more to explore here. I've never been great at these internet games. I did click around on the page trying to see if there was a hidden link but I couldn't find one. Somebody smart go figure it out and then give me all the credit. GET TO WORK, MINIONS!
Also, please make up some domain names, try them out and let me know if you come across any interesting ones in your internet spelunking.
Friday, May 15, 2009
Clearing up a little rumor about me
I heard a rumor about myself yesterday from a friend. It went like this: "Someone told me that you were asked to write for a television show."
Me: That's not exactly true.
Friend: I heard it was for 'The Office."
Me: !
Me: That's not true at all.
Here's the story that this rumor is probably based off of... when I was in college one of my professors in a screenwriting class was a well-respected television writer. She really liked my writing and a script I was working on for her class and she thought that she might be able to get me a job. She said there was this new television show coming out that was looking for young writers and I might be a good fit for it.
Professor: I think I can get you a job with this new television show.
Me: That's GREAT!
Prof: It's a show based on a movie.
Me: What movie?
Prof: It was called Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Me: HA HA HA! That was a terrible movie!
Prof (offended): I don't have to get you a job.
Me: No way! I will write for any show!
I finished the script as my prof requested and sent it to her and never heard from her again. I always assumed this was because I broke the Hollywood rule of never badmouthing the work of someone else because you might work with them in the future (I didn't know, I swear). It wouldn't be the first time that my Big Mouth got me in trouble. On the other hand, in retrospect, it may have been that the script I sent just wasn't very good. I try not to think about that.
Me: That's not exactly true.
Friend: I heard it was for 'The Office."
Me: !
Me: That's not true at all.
Here's the story that this rumor is probably based off of... when I was in college one of my professors in a screenwriting class was a well-respected television writer. She really liked my writing and a script I was working on for her class and she thought that she might be able to get me a job. She said there was this new television show coming out that was looking for young writers and I might be a good fit for it.
Professor: I think I can get you a job with this new television show.
Me: That's GREAT!
Prof: It's a show based on a movie.
Me: What movie?
Prof: It was called Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Me: HA HA HA! That was a terrible movie!
Prof (offended): I don't have to get you a job.
Me: No way! I will write for any show!
I finished the script as my prof requested and sent it to her and never heard from her again. I always assumed this was because I broke the Hollywood rule of never badmouthing the work of someone else because you might work with them in the future (I didn't know, I swear). It wouldn't be the first time that my Big Mouth got me in trouble. On the other hand, in retrospect, it may have been that the script I sent just wasn't very good. I try not to think about that.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Batman in "Bombs Away!"
I can tell by looking out into the blogosphere that you all are feeling a little down, so I thought I would cheer you up with this 1960's Batman clip:
Batman loves ducklings.
Batman loves ducklings.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
News From My Neighborhood: It's just not fair
Weeds. Pretty soon we're going on vacation, and when we get home I leave in a matter of days for a work trip. I told Krista I would work for her today doing whatever chores were most important, so I spent a large portion of today weeding our garden. One thought that came up several times was THANKS A LOT, ADAM! We really appreciate you providing weeds for us. Not that I would have done better, I'm sure. But I have my least charitable thoughts about you, Father Adam, when I am weeding. Especially when I am trying to carefully hand-pick those little weeds that have the explosive seeds that when you touch the weed they leap off like monstrous fleas and hit you in the face or burrow into the soil and then send out their tiny little maniacal laughs.
Words Kids Love But Don't Understand. I've been teaching the kids new words I think are useful for them. For instance, A was pleased to learn the word risible, and it's a word that is often useful for her. The one word my kids use multiple times a day but seem not to understand is the word "fair." For instance, A told me today that it was not fair that she has to use a car seat but that her older sister doesn't. I explained that it was, in fact, fair because when she reached Z's age, she, too, would be allowed to do away with her booster seat. I asked her if it was fair that Z was at school and she wasn't. I asked her if it was fair that we were going to the grocery store and she was going to get a cookie. Then she started laughing like crazy.
And then I saw a mom and her kid at the school having this conversation...
Kid: That's not fair!
Mom: Yes, it is!
Kid: It's not!
Mom: It is!
Kid: Not!
Mom: Yes, it is!
I personally think it's not fair of an adult to use their superior intellect and reasoning against a child like that, don't you agree?
I think I have a future in ornithology. I love it when the birds start returning to our neighborhood. We've been getting a lot of new birds at our feeder this year, and a good number of our old friends from last year, including a big bunch of yellow warblers. Today this black bird with red wings came to our back yard to say conk-a-lee! It seemed to have a message just for me. I wondered what sort of bird it was. Maybe a scarlet banded conkalee. Or a Crimson Midnight. Or an ebony feathered garnet winged backyard bird. So I decided to look it up. And, as it turns out, that black bird with the red wings is called... a red winged black bird. I am never looking up a bird's name again. What's that bird? Oh, that's a little brown speckled bird.
Words Kids Love But Don't Understand. I've been teaching the kids new words I think are useful for them. For instance, A was pleased to learn the word risible, and it's a word that is often useful for her. The one word my kids use multiple times a day but seem not to understand is the word "fair." For instance, A told me today that it was not fair that she has to use a car seat but that her older sister doesn't. I explained that it was, in fact, fair because when she reached Z's age, she, too, would be allowed to do away with her booster seat. I asked her if it was fair that Z was at school and she wasn't. I asked her if it was fair that we were going to the grocery store and she was going to get a cookie. Then she started laughing like crazy.
And then I saw a mom and her kid at the school having this conversation...
Kid: That's not fair!
Mom: Yes, it is!
Kid: It's not!
Mom: It is!
Kid: Not!
Mom: Yes, it is!
I personally think it's not fair of an adult to use their superior intellect and reasoning against a child like that, don't you agree?
I think I have a future in ornithology. I love it when the birds start returning to our neighborhood. We've been getting a lot of new birds at our feeder this year, and a good number of our old friends from last year, including a big bunch of yellow warblers. Today this black bird with red wings came to our back yard to say conk-a-lee! It seemed to have a message just for me. I wondered what sort of bird it was. Maybe a scarlet banded conkalee. Or a Crimson Midnight. Or an ebony feathered garnet winged backyard bird. So I decided to look it up. And, as it turns out, that black bird with the red wings is called... a red winged black bird. I am never looking up a bird's name again. What's that bird? Oh, that's a little brown speckled bird.
Chapter Five has been conquered
Earlier this week I finished chapter five of the book I'm currently writing.
That puts us here:
8022 / 60000 words. 13% done!
I haven't been able to work on it much this week, which was disappointing because I am enjoying it. But as you noticed I haven't been blogging much, either. I've been busy. Also sick. Cough, cough.
That puts us here:
I haven't been able to work on it much this week, which was disappointing because I am enjoying it. But as you noticed I haven't been blogging much, either. I've been busy. Also sick. Cough, cough.
What's on the bookshelf
Hey, you know the rules... send me a book and I'll put it up on the blog.
As it happens, I just received a book by a former atheist, and those of you who know me well know that I have a special affection for both atheists and anarchists. They're cute!
The fine folk at Bethany House just sent me a copy of Finding an Unseen God: Reflections of a Former Atheist
by Alicia Britt Chole. Here's a link to Alicia's blog, and here's a pdf where she answers some questions about the book.In any case, the book looks interesting... it starts with chapter 52 and is followed by chapter 1 and then the chapters continue to move toward the middle. I usually enjoy books that mess around a bit like that. I'll let you know once I read the book, but wanted to let you know what's on the bookshelf.
Thursday, May 07, 2009
Merry Christmas! Yay! More Books!
We got a package from Amazon yesterday with Krista's name on it. We shook it around for a while and couldn't remember ordering any books. Then KAPOW we remembered that Krista had ordered me a book for Christmas... a book that hadn't been published yet.
But -- it's a book I've been eagerly waiting for by Glen David Gold, the author of Carter Beats the Devil
, one of my absolute favorite books of the last few years. I think I've bought three or four copies of it. Anyway, Gold's new book, Sunnyside
, just came out and since Krista had ordered it for me it just arrived!
I am really excited to read this book. Excited enough that I think I'm going to save it... I have a couple of busy weeks coming up and then a quick vacation with the family. I think this will be my vacation book! Yeeha!
And, as an added bonus, because Amazon sends things in groups to save on shipping, I also got a new John MacDonald book, Bright Orange for the Shroud
. The MacDonald Travis McGee books are always a solid treat.
So, the moral of this story is that books are good. We need more books.
But -- it's a book I've been eagerly waiting for by Glen David Gold, the author of Carter Beats the Devil, one of my absolute favorite books of the last few years. I think I've bought three or four copies of it. Anyway, Gold's new book, Sunnyside, just came out and since Krista had ordered it for me it just arrived!I am really excited to read this book. Excited enough that I think I'm going to save it... I have a couple of busy weeks coming up and then a quick vacation with the family. I think this will be my vacation book! Yeeha!
And, as an added bonus, because Amazon sends things in groups to save on shipping, I also got a new John MacDonald book, Bright Orange for the Shroud
. The MacDonald Travis McGee books are always a solid treat.So, the moral of this story is that books are good. We need more books.
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
James Dean, East of Eden and my wife
We watched part of a documentary on James Dean last night. It mentioned that one of the three films that James Dean starred in before his death was an adaptation of Steinbeck's East of Eden... one of my favorite novels of all time. A lot of people are disturbed by the dark themes in the book, but I find it a fascinating and beautiful re-telling of the story of humanity's Fall.
Krista knows the book is my favorite (I've read it at least once a year since she originally forced me to read it). So she suggested, "You should add that to our Netflix cue."
"That would be fun," I said. "I'll do it."
"Oh, I'm sure that will be fun," she said. Implying, of course, that the content of the story is not something most people would describe as a joyride of free hilarity.
"Now you're just making fun of me," I said.
"Yes," she said.
I'm glad you're home, Krista. I missed you!
Krista knows the book is my favorite (I've read it at least once a year since she originally forced me to read it). So she suggested, "You should add that to our Netflix cue."
"That would be fun," I said. "I'll do it."
"Oh, I'm sure that will be fun," she said. Implying, of course, that the content of the story is not something most people would describe as a joyride of free hilarity.
"Now you're just making fun of me," I said.
"Yes," she said.
I'm glad you're home, Krista. I missed you!
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
Babbafay
I don't know if that's the right way to spell it, but babbafay is the most common word in A's nonsense language, which is called "A Language."
I asked her what it meant today and she told me that it means I Love You or Potty Monster depending on the day. Another popular word is guavafay but she has never revealed the meaning of that.
I thought she would enjoy hearing a poem with a lot of nonsense in it so I started quoting Carroll's "The Jabberwocky" to her--Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe--you know all that. A told me that she thought it would be a nonsense poem and that she understood too many words.
As she ate dinner with Z tonight I heard her saying: Z, if you ever want to tell your boyfriend that you love him --
Z: I don't want to have a boyfriend --
A: Your boy that is a friend, then, and you want to tell him that you love him, you can just say babbafay. You can tell him what babbafay means and then when you want to say I love you then you can say babbafay and then no one will know that you said I love you --
Me: Hey. Be careful, you might accidentally call him a potty monster.
A: HA HA HA!
Me: Now eat your dinner.
I asked her what it meant today and she told me that it means I Love You or Potty Monster depending on the day. Another popular word is guavafay but she has never revealed the meaning of that.
I thought she would enjoy hearing a poem with a lot of nonsense in it so I started quoting Carroll's "The Jabberwocky" to her--Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe--you know all that. A told me that she thought it would be a nonsense poem and that she understood too many words.
As she ate dinner with Z tonight I heard her saying: Z, if you ever want to tell your boyfriend that you love him --
Z: I don't want to have a boyfriend --
A: Your boy that is a friend, then, and you want to tell him that you love him, you can just say babbafay. You can tell him what babbafay means and then when you want to say I love you then you can say babbafay and then no one will know that you said I love you --
Me: Hey. Be careful, you might accidentally call him a potty monster.
A: HA HA HA!
Me: Now eat your dinner.
Campus Crusade for Christ in the Funny Pages
This last weekend was Free Comic Book Day... my kids got an Archie comic and liked it so much that I decided to go back and look around and see if I could find another one for them. What I found was an old Spire Comics "Christian" Archie comic called Archie's Sonshine.
Of course the kids love it.
I liked this bit where Ethel becomes a Christian and then heads off to the beach with her Four Spiritual Laws:
Archie isn't thrilled about that way of doing things, but Betty says there's nothing wrong with it. Notice also the cameo of the swinging, bearded hep cat who shows up on the beach in his van to tell all the kids about God (you can see what he looks like in the top panel of the page below).
Anyway, enjoy (if you click on the pages you can see them larger). If you want to see full Spire Comics that have been scanned in, check out this page.
Of course the kids love it.
I liked this bit where Ethel becomes a Christian and then heads off to the beach with her Four Spiritual Laws:
Archie isn't thrilled about that way of doing things, but Betty says there's nothing wrong with it. Notice also the cameo of the swinging, bearded hep cat who shows up on the beach in his van to tell all the kids about God (you can see what he looks like in the top panel of the page below).
Anyway, enjoy (if you click on the pages you can see them larger). If you want to see full Spire Comics that have been scanned in, check out this page.
Monday, May 04, 2009
Four down, Thirty-six to go
So. Tired. It's hard being Mr. Mom. Not as hard as being an actual Mom, I'm sure. For instance, I fed the kids a frozen pizza for dinner. I only made one of them take a bath. I told them they could play with knives. I told them they had to brush at least half their teeth.
All that to say, I didn't feel like writing tonight. But then I did write, and I had fun.
I type too fast when I'm writing, which means I get a lot of hard-to-catch typos where I type real words in the wrong place. And then there's the weird phenomenon that I always want to write the word "both" with an "e" on the end. This happens bothe when I am writing and when I am typing. It doesn't look weird to me... it looks right. Not sure why that is.
Anyway, wrote through chapter four tonight which brings me to the first milestone that counts... TEN PERCENT! YAY! Just do that nine more times and it's done (he says to himself, as if giving a pep talk).
6432 / 60000 words. 11% done!
In other news, it is raining a lot.
And now... to bed!
All that to say, I didn't feel like writing tonight. But then I did write, and I had fun.
I type too fast when I'm writing, which means I get a lot of hard-to-catch typos where I type real words in the wrong place. And then there's the weird phenomenon that I always want to write the word "both" with an "e" on the end. This happens bothe when I am writing and when I am typing. It doesn't look weird to me... it looks right. Not sure why that is.
Anyway, wrote through chapter four tonight which brings me to the first milestone that counts... TEN PERCENT! YAY! Just do that nine more times and it's done (he says to himself, as if giving a pep talk).
In other news, it is raining a lot.
And now... to bed!
Sunday, May 03, 2009
Writing a New Book Starting Tonight
Krista's away on a wives' retreat with other CCC wives tonight and tomorrow night.
Usually this means that I rent crappy movies, feed the kids crappy food, and do my best to explore mindless entertainments too "low brow" for my wife. Tonight I had decided to watch "Shawn of the Dead" because it is something Krista will never, ever watch and I thought it might be fun.
But then I thought that instead I would work on a new book. I finished my previous book a while ago and my agent has been shopping it around. I'm certain that if anyone ends up publishing it that there will be plenty of work yet to do on it, but last weekend a new idea for a book jumped into my brain and has been carving out a little cave for itself in my thought life. When this happens to me I don't usually get much rest from the incessant nagging in my brain until I finish it... so I thought I'd go ahead and use tonight for something a little more productive. I wrote the first chapter late last weekend and wrote chapter two tonight. I've got three all blocked out, and a solid idea of the overall plot, though it's not a beat sheet by any stretch of the imagination. And I have a title I really like, but you'll have to wait a while for that. I want to savor it for a little while.
Anyway, my friend Adrian sent me an email a long time ago about how I should be reading the comic "The Immortal Iron Fist" so when the local comic book shop had a big sale this weekend I bought a big stack of them and have been enjoying them. So I'm off to bed RIGHT NOW to enjoy one more ish of Iron Fist before sleepy time.
And, for those of you who need some feeling of progress, who want to know how much of the book I've written so far (always keeping in mind it's a first draft), here ya go:
3543 / 60000 words. 6% done!
Six percent. Wow. I feel like I've accomplished something now. <--- that's sarcasm for all of you out there with busted sarcasm sensors.
Usually this means that I rent crappy movies, feed the kids crappy food, and do my best to explore mindless entertainments too "low brow" for my wife. Tonight I had decided to watch "Shawn of the Dead" because it is something Krista will never, ever watch and I thought it might be fun.
But then I thought that instead I would work on a new book. I finished my previous book a while ago and my agent has been shopping it around. I'm certain that if anyone ends up publishing it that there will be plenty of work yet to do on it, but last weekend a new idea for a book jumped into my brain and has been carving out a little cave for itself in my thought life. When this happens to me I don't usually get much rest from the incessant nagging in my brain until I finish it... so I thought I'd go ahead and use tonight for something a little more productive. I wrote the first chapter late last weekend and wrote chapter two tonight. I've got three all blocked out, and a solid idea of the overall plot, though it's not a beat sheet by any stretch of the imagination. And I have a title I really like, but you'll have to wait a while for that. I want to savor it for a little while.
Anyway, my friend Adrian sent me an email a long time ago about how I should be reading the comic "The Immortal Iron Fist" so when the local comic book shop had a big sale this weekend I bought a big stack of them and have been enjoying them. So I'm off to bed RIGHT NOW to enjoy one more ish of Iron Fist before sleepy time.
And, for those of you who need some feeling of progress, who want to know how much of the book I've written so far (always keeping in mind it's a first draft), here ya go:
Six percent. Wow. I feel like I've accomplished something now. <--- that's sarcasm for all of you out there with busted sarcasm sensors.
Saturday, May 02, 2009
News From My Neighborhood: Cats Aflame!
A Cat In Red Square
I've written more than once about Gemma, the miniature tiger who lives next door. She has a new litter of kittens. She's been hiding them around the neighbor's house. She doesn't like anyone to look at them. She moves them if they're found. The little girl next door (D) came over and knocked on the door this week, looking for Z and A. Gemma followed her over, looking like she was ready to pounce on something. I pointed her out and D said, "She's a Russian cat."
Attempted Matricide.
My neighbor to the North, Derek, and I were talking about Gemma yesterday. She has a little bit of a reputation in the neighborhood because of the fact that this is her second litter of kittens and no one knows who the Father is. Also, she walks through everyone's yards with an expectation of impunity. And she smokes the discarded cigarettes around the neighborhood. And she eats our frogs. And I caught her in the plum tree trying to eat our birds. Do they not feed her? Good grief. Anyway, Derek and I were trading Gemma stories and then Derek said that he had seen our neighbor to the West (they of the fake dogs and the hate mail) driving toward home as Gemma was crossing the street. Suddenly, he swerved the car toward her. Derek claims he drove up onto the sidewalk attempting to hit her! Of course she evaded him. Then he got out of his car calmly and looked around to make sure no one had seen him. He better watch his back now. Gemma will be waiting for him, crouched in the bushes of his back yard.
Where there's Smoke there's A Fire Truck.
Krsita called me upstairs last night to tell me that I was missing "something dramatic" in the neighborhood. Someone to the NW needed a fire truck. The first drama was the fire truck trying to squeeze past the corner where our house is... gets pretty narrow with all the cars parked out there. As we watched, the firemen started exploring the neighbor's garage with flashlights. They did this for a long time. They evacuated the house. No cops came, so we don't think it was anything illegal... but soon the firemen were tromping all through the house with flashlights. This went on long enough that we got bored of trying to figure it out and went to bed. THEN THE HOUSE EXPLODED! Just kidding.
Birds of a Feather.
Lots of birds this season. We even had a flicker in the back yard this week! It's a pretty large type of woodpecker. It mostly ate bugs out of the grass. Neat.
I've written more than once about Gemma, the miniature tiger who lives next door. She has a new litter of kittens. She's been hiding them around the neighbor's house. She doesn't like anyone to look at them. She moves them if they're found. The little girl next door (D) came over and knocked on the door this week, looking for Z and A. Gemma followed her over, looking like she was ready to pounce on something. I pointed her out and D said, "She's a Russian cat."
Attempted Matricide.
My neighbor to the North, Derek, and I were talking about Gemma yesterday. She has a little bit of a reputation in the neighborhood because of the fact that this is her second litter of kittens and no one knows who the Father is. Also, she walks through everyone's yards with an expectation of impunity. And she smokes the discarded cigarettes around the neighborhood. And she eats our frogs. And I caught her in the plum tree trying to eat our birds. Do they not feed her? Good grief. Anyway, Derek and I were trading Gemma stories and then Derek said that he had seen our neighbor to the West (they of the fake dogs and the hate mail) driving toward home as Gemma was crossing the street. Suddenly, he swerved the car toward her. Derek claims he drove up onto the sidewalk attempting to hit her! Of course she evaded him. Then he got out of his car calmly and looked around to make sure no one had seen him. He better watch his back now. Gemma will be waiting for him, crouched in the bushes of his back yard.
Where there's Smoke there's A Fire Truck.
Krsita called me upstairs last night to tell me that I was missing "something dramatic" in the neighborhood. Someone to the NW needed a fire truck. The first drama was the fire truck trying to squeeze past the corner where our house is... gets pretty narrow with all the cars parked out there. As we watched, the firemen started exploring the neighbor's garage with flashlights. They did this for a long time. They evacuated the house. No cops came, so we don't think it was anything illegal... but soon the firemen were tromping all through the house with flashlights. This went on long enough that we got bored of trying to figure it out and went to bed. THEN THE HOUSE EXPLODED! Just kidding.
Birds of a Feather.
Lots of birds this season. We even had a flicker in the back yard this week! It's a pretty large type of woodpecker. It mostly ate bugs out of the grass. Neat.
Friday, May 01, 2009
FREE COMIC BOOK DAY this Saturday!
Don't forget that this weekend is free comic book day!
If you live in Portland or Vancouver, here are some stores near you that will have free comics available.
Art show this weekend
If you have some free time and you want to go see some beautiful watercolors by our most infamous friend, The Omnivore, then you need to head to the beach tomorrow.
Here's a news article about the show.
Here's a news article about the show.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Birds in the Bedroom
My kids have a freakish ability to wake up at 6:55 a.m. every morning. It doesn't matter how late they stay up. It doesn't matter how tired they are. Weekends. Weekdays. Holidays.
Yesterday morning they somehow slept in. At 7:15 I went to check on them and they were asleep, but I could hear the most raucous caucophony of birds outside their window... like "CAT IN OUR TREE EMERGENCY" sort of bird calls. I was amazed at how loud it was.
The kids came down a little later and I mentioned to them how loud the birds had been in their room a few minutes before.
Z got a sly look on her face and she watched me with sidelong eyes. "That's our alarm clock," she said.
"Ha ha," I said.
"No, really. 'A' figured out how to turn it on and we set it for 6:55 every morning."
Aha. Mystery solved.
Yesterday morning they somehow slept in. At 7:15 I went to check on them and they were asleep, but I could hear the most raucous caucophony of birds outside their window... like "CAT IN OUR TREE EMERGENCY" sort of bird calls. I was amazed at how loud it was.
The kids came down a little later and I mentioned to them how loud the birds had been in their room a few minutes before.
Z got a sly look on her face and she watched me with sidelong eyes. "That's our alarm clock," she said.
"Ha ha," I said.
"No, really. 'A' figured out how to turn it on and we set it for 6:55 every morning."
Aha. Mystery solved.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Bread of Life
I read this scripture this morning:
John 6:30-35
So they said to Jesus, 'What sign are you going to give us then, so that we may see it and believe you? What work are you performing? Our ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness; as it is written, "He gave them bread from heaven to eat." ' Then Jesus said to them, 'Very truly, I tell you, it was not Moses who gave you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is that which comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.' They said to him, 'Sir, give us this bread always.' Jesus said to them, 'I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.'
In the midst of a lot of changes coming up this next year, I found these words of Christ encouraging. They give me peace. The team I work on is losing a couple of our key players and it's easy to look at our lack instead of what we have. I'm sure it's the same for you, that there are places in your life where there is simply "not enough." Not enough money, not enough laborers, not enough time, not enough strength, not enough health, not enough vitality. And they're not just things we want, they're things we need... necessities like bread and water, things we cannot live without.
Here's a reminder from Christ that he is the answer to those needs, the bread of life who eternally fulfills hunger, the object of a belief that brings springs of living water bursting up from within us. For those who know and walk with Christ the loss of all our resources is not enough to impoverish us. On the contrary, perhaps it is a reminder of the vast storehouse of riches available to us that we consistently forget about when we are "without need."
I am reminded that if I stay focused on my master, that he will take care of my needs by the unlimited resource of his presence. And that brings me a moment of peace.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
She's got herself in stitches
Sunday night after a celebration of my Mom's birthday, Shasta brought the kids back over to our place. A got out of the car laughing at the name of Shasta's sheep when she was a kid ("Monster", which A had decided should have been called "Monster Booger"). This created a storm of laughter which caused A to double over and then split her head open against the side of the car door.
After a LOT of crying and phone calls and me trying to put it off we decided that the cut was too wide not to be addressed by the professionals, so I took A down to the ER. Of course my kids always do these things when the regular offices are closed. They prefer the more expensive care of the ER.
A was (understandably) upset, and there was a lot of tears, sobs, hyperventilating and reminder to breathe normally. After a couple of hours we got into the back (by the way -- in t.v. shows the ER constantly has people with pipes sticking out of their chests and things like that being brought in and all the doctors have to stop kissing in the supply closet to go take care of it... I mostly saw relaxed doctors and people who looked vaguely in pain) to see the doctor.
A's unassailable terror of getting stitches came out when the Dr. said she was going to need a couple, so they left me in the room for twenty minutes to calm her down. I kept telling her that it was going to be all right, that I was her Dad, that she could trust me, that I promised it wouldn't hurt much, that I would protect her if anyone tried to hurt her. I finally convinced her she would have to sit still when the doc came back.
Which she did. The stitches (2) went fast. A got a stuffed bunny rabbit. From start to finish, A's head wound only took about five and half hours to deal with. Whew. We were exhausted.
I learned many lessons from this time:
1) The fear of the future is often worse than the future itself. A's four hours of exhausting terror about the coming stitches were far worse than the four minutes of calm as the doctor actually provided them. I have this issue myself. I can get wrapped up in 'what ifs' and worst case scenarios that are far more upsetting than the actual future I run into. In the end, A didn't really like getting stitches but now she has a new bunny and her cut is healing faster.
2) You can trust your Dad when he says it's going to be okay. A says she'll know this is true next time. Stitches don't hurt. I know I don't always trust the people who care about me and know my situation. I certainly don't always trust that God is in control. But this was a good reminder that I can trust Him in the midst of frightening or difficult circumstances.
3) Once the question of 'is this going to hurt' is out of the way, a young lady's next question is, 'Will this effect my looks'? Once A was relatively certain that the stitches might not hurt she started asking if her cut was ugly and were scars ugly.
4) I'm surprised this hasn't happened already. Let's be honest. Something funnier than 'Monster Booger' gets said in our house pretty much every day.
5) Kids' vocabulary makes me laugh even when I shouldn't. When A heard she might have to have stitches she burst into tears and shouted NO THEY CAN'T PUT STITCHES ON MY HEAD! MY HEAD IS FRAGILE!
6) When your six year old has to go to the ER it's okay to spoil them. When they feel so lousy that they don't want a milkshake, the least you can do is offer them one.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
17 Again
Krista and I went on a date tonight. We went out to dinner and then went to see this movie:
The story is basically "Big" in reverse... a grown up wishes he was small and he becomes a high schooler and has adventures and of course it's a love story and a family story (Etc, etc) but mostly it's about Zac Efron working as a sort of magnet for the money of every young woman who walks near a movie theater. The movie was enjoyable, overall. Genuinely funny in places. I have to admit I felt awkward when I told the movie ticket guy which movie I wanted tickets to see. And I felt awkward again when the thirty or so people in line ahead of us were walking into the same theater and they were all aged 13-17 (female).
But we had a good time.
And since I'm sure anyone who stumbles on this blog post may well be coming from the intended audience I will now include some reviews snagged from YouTube from some young ladies who have posted their thoughts:
Also:
But the point is that I had a good time hanging out with my wife. Yay for dates with my wife!
The story is basically "Big" in reverse... a grown up wishes he was small and he becomes a high schooler and has adventures and of course it's a love story and a family story (Etc, etc) but mostly it's about Zac Efron working as a sort of magnet for the money of every young woman who walks near a movie theater. The movie was enjoyable, overall. Genuinely funny in places. I have to admit I felt awkward when I told the movie ticket guy which movie I wanted tickets to see. And I felt awkward again when the thirty or so people in line ahead of us were walking into the same theater and they were all aged 13-17 (female).
But we had a good time.
And since I'm sure anyone who stumbles on this blog post may well be coming from the intended audience I will now include some reviews snagged from YouTube from some young ladies who have posted their thoughts:
"omg. i watched it tonight, and i LOVED it. i am soooooo buying it when it comes out on DVD!!! ahhh, i'm so excited. the scene when he comes out of the car, with his aviator shades on....TOTALLY HOT. i almost hyperventilated in the theater...not gonna lie. geesh. and the movie made me cry in one part...watch it, and you'll know what i'm talking about."
Also:
"omj omj this movie is awsome i saw it today its soo funny my fave part is when zacs dancing with the mom and alex walks in and is like do you always dance with your friends mom? no no no! its soo funny!! this movie rocks <3"
But the point is that I had a good time hanging out with my wife. Yay for dates with my wife!
Friday, April 24, 2009
Thursday, April 23, 2009
BACK FROM THE DEAD!
Coach's Midnight Diner, the Christian horror anthology is BACK FROM THE DEAD!
You may recall that yours truly was a story editor on this edition of the diner, and my friend Adrian did the cover.
If you're looking for a hardboiled anthology of horror, crime, detective, paranormal and weird fiction with a Christian slant... well, you found it. You ain't gonna find it nowhere else, Buster, so pony up.
You may recall that yours truly was a story editor on this edition of the diner, and my friend Adrian did the cover.
If you're looking for a hardboiled anthology of horror, crime, detective, paranormal and weird fiction with a Christian slant... well, you found it. You ain't gonna find it nowhere else, Buster, so pony up.
Free music from the Autumn Film
You know I always give you guys free music when I am able to give you free music because my friends are giving it away. It's so true. It's because I am a giver.
Well, those fine, fine rock stars The Autumn Film are giving away a few new songs as well as a video of the excellent song "Joy"... a song that I've been listening to pretty much every day since I first heard it.
Here's the link, feel free to pass it along!
Well, those fine, fine rock stars The Autumn Film are giving away a few new songs as well as a video of the excellent song "Joy"... a song that I've been listening to pretty much every day since I first heard it.
Here's the link, feel free to pass it along!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Wise move, small fry
On the way to school this morning...
Z: Dad, did you put Doritos in my lunch today?
Me: No. I put raisins and almonds.
Z: WHY NO DORITOS?
Me: I thought you liked raisins.
Z: WHY NO DORITOS?
Me: You're eight years old now, I guess you could get up and make your own lunch. It would only take a few minutes.
Pause.
Z: Thank you for making my lunch today, Daddy.
Z: Dad, did you put Doritos in my lunch today?
Me: No. I put raisins and almonds.
Z: WHY NO DORITOS?
Me: I thought you liked raisins.
Z: WHY NO DORITOS?
Me: You're eight years old now, I guess you could get up and make your own lunch. It would only take a few minutes.
Pause.
Z: Thank you for making my lunch today, Daddy.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
News From My Neighborhood
Spring Has Sprung. Z has to write little notes to me as part of her homework and I have to write a note back to her. A recent one asked, "Daddy, what signs do you see that Spring has come?" The tulips and daffodils are blooming. Our plum tree has flowered and now leafed out. Our maple tree is bearing seeds for the first time since we planted it! And the raucous chorus of birds is back... yesterday Krista and I saw six yellow warblers on our bird feeder. We'd like to think that the two brightest ones are the hatchlings from last year's nest in the maple. Aaaand, the neighbor's cat just had a litter of three kittens. Just like every spring. She gets lonely in the winter.
Dream a Little Dream. I had this vivid dream the night before last with my friend Lisa Hansen from college. I was walking on this balcony thing and I could see her going down an escalator and we saw each other and tried to say hello but the escalator was rapidly taking her under the balcony. I shouted for her to tell me her phone number but I couldn't understand what she was saying... seemed like she kept throwing letters in with the numbers. So, Lisa, if you're out there somewhere give me a call! Your Dream Message did not come through with a clear phone number.
Mystery Solved. You may recall a while back that Tyndale mysteriously sent me a copy of "If God Disappears." Well, I wrote the author so I could send a thank you to whomever sent me the book and it turns out that it was the author himself (David Sanford) who sent me the book. Pretty nice. So I met him yesterday for coffee (you may recall that I had orange juice) and we had a good time hanging out. A really nice guy with a ridiculous amount of stories and a lot of great experiences to share. So that's that. You may be thinking, "Matt, are you trying to rub it in that you were hanging out with some published guy who gave you a free book?" To which I would say, stop being so sensitive you big sissy.
Another Mystery. Why is "orange" not spelled "oranje"? I have to say that I am generally a traditionalist when it comes to spelling, but a total liberal when it comes to that word.
New Neighbors. Someone has FINALLY bought this house to the northwest of us. I wonder what they are like? I'm told that it's a young married couple. I hope they are weird enough to make it on the blog. As if in celebration, Krista and I drank some fresh strawberry milkshakes from Burgerville last night.
Dream a Little Dream. I had this vivid dream the night before last with my friend Lisa Hansen from college. I was walking on this balcony thing and I could see her going down an escalator and we saw each other and tried to say hello but the escalator was rapidly taking her under the balcony. I shouted for her to tell me her phone number but I couldn't understand what she was saying... seemed like she kept throwing letters in with the numbers. So, Lisa, if you're out there somewhere give me a call! Your Dream Message did not come through with a clear phone number.
Mystery Solved. You may recall a while back that Tyndale mysteriously sent me a copy of "If God Disappears." Well, I wrote the author so I could send a thank you to whomever sent me the book and it turns out that it was the author himself (David Sanford) who sent me the book. Pretty nice. So I met him yesterday for coffee (you may recall that I had orange juice) and we had a good time hanging out. A really nice guy with a ridiculous amount of stories and a lot of great experiences to share. So that's that. You may be thinking, "Matt, are you trying to rub it in that you were hanging out with some published guy who gave you a free book?" To which I would say, stop being so sensitive you big sissy.
Another Mystery. Why is "orange" not spelled "oranje"? I have to say that I am generally a traditionalist when it comes to spelling, but a total liberal when it comes to that word.
New Neighbors. Someone has FINALLY bought this house to the northwest of us. I wonder what they are like? I'm told that it's a young married couple. I hope they are weird enough to make it on the blog. As if in celebration, Krista and I drank some fresh strawberry milkshakes from Burgerville last night.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Happy Birthday, Z!
Eight years old... I can scarcely believe it.
You don't have to use a car seat anymore after today! I can't believe this picture was taken of you only two years ago... you are growing up so fast.
I'm really proud of you... you are a great reader, an excellent story teller and so much fun to be around. I'm glad you love horses and swimming and skiing and drawing.
Keep up the good work at school. I know pretty soon you will read faster than me and I think your Spanish is already better than mine! I love you! Have a great birthday!
Eight more years and you get your driver's license!
The Squeaky THING Which Lives In Our Attic (?)
You may recall that I mentioned the strange squeaking thing in our room some time ago. Our friend Hillary asked for an update on this inexplicable phenomenon, so here goes.
Observations about... The Thing:
1) Despite the changing hours of light, it remains ridiculously punctual in its squeaking. It usually squeaks sometime between 10:30 pm and 11 pm.
2) It nearly always squeaks in the precise same pattern: SqueEEEK squeak.
3) I've noticed that anytime I hear the squeak I also can hear the faint sound of an airplane overhead (this might be coincidence, of course... there are planes flying over our house reasonably often during the day and night).
4) The sound of the squeaking sounds uncannily similar to the sound of the cheap phone beside our bed... if it were truncated into a sickly, nano-second version of its three second ring.
Current theories about... The Thing include:
1) A bat. A punctual, friendly bat who likes to say good night to us each evening.
2) A mechanical bat. Who is not friendly, he is just programmed that way.
3) Our phone has some sort of defect that causes it to squeak when planes fly overhead. But only between the hours of 1030 and 11.
4) A mass auditory hallucination that is isolated to only Krista and I.
Please feel free to leave comments with your theories as well. Scientific testing for authentification of... The Thing will begin shortly.
Observations about... The Thing:
1) Despite the changing hours of light, it remains ridiculously punctual in its squeaking. It usually squeaks sometime between 10:30 pm and 11 pm.
2) It nearly always squeaks in the precise same pattern: SqueEEEK squeak.
3) I've noticed that anytime I hear the squeak I also can hear the faint sound of an airplane overhead (this might be coincidence, of course... there are planes flying over our house reasonably often during the day and night).
4) The sound of the squeaking sounds uncannily similar to the sound of the cheap phone beside our bed... if it were truncated into a sickly, nano-second version of its three second ring.
Current theories about... The Thing include:
1) A bat. A punctual, friendly bat who likes to say good night to us each evening.
2) A mechanical bat. Who is not friendly, he is just programmed that way.
3) Our phone has some sort of defect that causes it to squeak when planes fly overhead. But only between the hours of 1030 and 11.
4) A mass auditory hallucination that is isolated to only Krista and I.
Please feel free to leave comments with your theories as well. Scientific testing for authentification of... The Thing will begin shortly.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Why I Hate Jane Austen
In 1995 I was attending University in Riverside, California. Like anyone else I went to class, stayed up too late, got up too late, ate lunch for breakfast, had too little money, ate too much garbage, met lots of great people and had a great time.
What I never told anyone about was the crazy old professor of Physics who worked in this cramped office off on the edge of campus. As you probably already guessed he plays a major part in the story of how I came to hate Jane Austen.
This is because he had invented time travel. It doesn't work how you might think. You get one chance to travel through time. I picked to go back in time to meet Jane Austen. He told me I was nuts. But I said I wanted to do it. So he sent me back to the year 1800.
The only problem being that I was in California still. Riverside, California in 1800 didn't have any smog at least, or anything else. I was mad at my professor but he was the sort of guy who would forget to mention something like this.
It took me almost two years to get to England and then to find Jane Austen. Then she totally dissed me because I was completely poverty stricken. Also she said I was too proud.
And I said, "Jane, I hope you will reconsider my proposal of marriage." And she was all like, "Mr. Mikalatos, I hope that in the future you will see fit to call me by a more fitting name, like 'Miss Austen.'"
And I did. And we totally were going to get married. But then the Bronte sisters showed up and told her that I had been all making eyes at them which was SO. NOT. TRUE.
But she immediately went off to Basingstoke. Soon enough I received an epistolary communication telling me that she had accepted a proposal of marriage from Harris Bigg-Wither. Mr. Bigg-Wither! That fat, stuttering boy! But he was rich and I knew the Austen family would be cared for financially.
Crushed, I turned the dial on my time travel device and returned to modern day. I smashed it to bits. I would never return to the past because the pain was too great. Then I bought a biography about Jane, hoping to learn that she had lived a happy life. But instead I discovered that she had broken her engagement to Bigg-Wither within a day of making it and spent the rest of her life mourning a strange, poor foreigner with an impossible name. She never married.
Oh, you foolish woman! Sniff, sniff. Waaaaaaah!
*Sob*
And that is why I hate Jane Austen novels.
THE END
What I never told anyone about was the crazy old professor of Physics who worked in this cramped office off on the edge of campus. As you probably already guessed he plays a major part in the story of how I came to hate Jane Austen.
This is because he had invented time travel. It doesn't work how you might think. You get one chance to travel through time. I picked to go back in time to meet Jane Austen. He told me I was nuts. But I said I wanted to do it. So he sent me back to the year 1800.
The only problem being that I was in California still. Riverside, California in 1800 didn't have any smog at least, or anything else. I was mad at my professor but he was the sort of guy who would forget to mention something like this.
It took me almost two years to get to England and then to find Jane Austen. Then she totally dissed me because I was completely poverty stricken. Also she said I was too proud.
And I said, "Jane, I hope you will reconsider my proposal of marriage." And she was all like, "Mr. Mikalatos, I hope that in the future you will see fit to call me by a more fitting name, like 'Miss Austen.'"
And I did. And we totally were going to get married. But then the Bronte sisters showed up and told her that I had been all making eyes at them which was SO. NOT. TRUE.
But she immediately went off to Basingstoke. Soon enough I received an epistolary communication telling me that she had accepted a proposal of marriage from Harris Bigg-Wither. Mr. Bigg-Wither! That fat, stuttering boy! But he was rich and I knew the Austen family would be cared for financially.
Crushed, I turned the dial on my time travel device and returned to modern day. I smashed it to bits. I would never return to the past because the pain was too great. Then I bought a biography about Jane, hoping to learn that she had lived a happy life. But instead I discovered that she had broken her engagement to Bigg-Wither within a day of making it and spent the rest of her life mourning a strange, poor foreigner with an impossible name. She never married.
Oh, you foolish woman! Sniff, sniff. Waaaaaaah!
*Sob*
And that is why I hate Jane Austen novels.
THE END
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Trigger Fail
I saw this little beauty of a water gun at a toy store today. Whoever designed it didn't think trigger placement through very carefully. Oops.
100 Books, the ones I've read and some thoughts pertaining to them
My friend Christine tagged me on a list of books purported to be put together by the BBC. This list of 100 books included the note that the BBC claimed most people had only read six books on the list. I started looking at it more carefully and thought that was weird, since books like "The Bible" and "all the Harry Potter" books were listed.
A little research revealed that it was actually a list put together by the Guardian via poll of "people's favorite books" which explains both the eclectic selections and the fact that there are both excellent and TERRIBLE AWFUL books listed. It would also explain why many of my favorite books aren't listed.... because of the Philistines responding to the poll.
Here's the list, with the original instructions and my commentary included:
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl - Dahl must be read. It's essential.
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo -- Yes, of course. And I know the soundtrack to the musical I have never seen. Go figure.
A little research revealed that it was actually a list put together by the Guardian via poll of "people's favorite books" which explains both the eclectic selections and the fact that there are both excellent and TERRIBLE AWFUL books listed. It would also explain why many of my favorite books aren't listed.... because of the Philistines responding to the poll.
Here's the list, with the original instructions and my commentary included:
The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books listed here. How do your reading habits stack up? Share with your fellow readers.
Copy, edit, and paste into a note of your own.
1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen – Yeah. Why is this book number 1?
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien – But of course.
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte – Yeah. It’s hard to express how much I dislike the Brontes and their ilk (yes, I’m looking at you Jane Austen).
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling – Right here I start to wonder if this whole list is a scam. The BBC think that people have only read 6 of the listed books? Every kid in
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee – I loved this book. And the movie.
6 The Bible – Yes, yes.
7
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell – They don’t call me “Big Brother” for nothing, home slice.
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman – Yeah. First book, great. Second book, okay. Third book… complete
unexpected pile of steaming poo.
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens – Be amazed to discover I’ve only read one Dickens book. Read on to discover it (oh the excitement).
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott – I don’t think so.
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy -- Yeah
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller – About halfway through I wanted out as bad as the characters so I threw the book
into the ocean.
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare – Hello, English major here. Of course.
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier – Nope. I never read books named after people.
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien – Yeah, several times. When I was like six.
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk – Never heard of this book.
18 Catcher in the
19 The Time Traveller’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger – nope.
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot – No.
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchel – saw the movie.
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald – Sure. It was okay.
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens – No.
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy – Yes. So thankful for the cast of characters list in the back.
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams – Yeah. Don’t panic.
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh – Nope.
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky – No.
29
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame –Parts of it. And I rode the ride at
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy -- No.
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens-- No.
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis – Yeah.
34 Emma - Jane Austen -- Yup.
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen – Yup. I took a class in college. I read all this crap.
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis – Yeah, of course. Were you not listening to number 33?
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini – Sitting on the shelf in my room. Everyone tells me it’s good but I can’t
get up the guts to read it.
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres Mais – Saw the movie. Vague memory of Nicholas Cage goofing around on the beach with some topless women. Never felt compelled to seek out the book for some reason. Hmmmm.
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden – No.
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne – OF COURSE!
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell – Yes. 1984 with animals. Classic.
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown – Sadly, yes. So sad that I have read this. It’s like having an albatross around my neck.
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez – Love it.
44 A Prayer for Owen Meany - John Irving – Yup. It was fine.
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins – No.
46 Anne of Green Gables – No. How many times do I have to see that mini-series for it to count?
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy -- No.
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood – Yes. I liked it, as I recall. Krista is not a fan.
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding – Love it! C.S. Lewis called the vivid writing in this book “hallucinogenic.” I think that’s right. A great book.
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan – No. Someone once told me I write like McEwan, though, and I took that as a big compliment. Might have been referring to my handwriting, I guess.
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel – Yes. Book = good. Author and author notes = pretentious.
52 Dune - Frank Herbert – Yeah. Classic sci-fi. Just don’t eat the Spice, you don’t know what that stuff is made out of.
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons – Nope.
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen – Unfortunately I slogged through this in college. Or is it bad manners to say “slogged”? I forget.
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth – Never heard of this book.
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon – this book is unknown to me.
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens – No. But I hear it is the best of books and the worst of books.
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley – Of course. Don’t you get forced to read this in college at some point? I preferred 1984 overall.
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night – Yeah. It was interesting. I enjoyed it.
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez-- Yup. I’m a fan.
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck – Yes. Thanks to my wife I’ve now read every word Steinbeck ever wrote (minus grocery lists).
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov – No.
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt Yes. Had some great moments but devolved rapidly.
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold - No
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas No. I’ve seen a painting, though.
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac No. But I’ve often written notes to myself without editing them, too.
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy No.
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding – No. And if the movie is even remotely related to the book I would
gladly lob a Molotov cocktail at this book.
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie No. But I like Rushdie pretty well so I’ll probably get around to it eventually.
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville No. But it’s on my to-do list as one I think I would love forever.
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens – No. Because I am lame.
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker Yes. Then I did a book report on it where I fashioned a cardboard coffin and put a stuffed penguin inside.
73 The
74 Notes From A
75 Ulysses - James Joyce Unfortunately, yes. This thing is a monstrosity designed to make critics and scholars have something to do with their time.
76 The Inferno - Dante Yes, yes, I know all about the nine circles.
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome Never heard of it. Title sounds promising.
78 Germinal - Emile Zola NO
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray NO
80 Possession - AS Byatt As a matter of fact I read it and found it interesting. I liked the ending better than the whole rest of the book.
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens – Yes, I’ve read it.
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell Another I’ve never heard of.
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker I think I purposely avoided this movie. Whoopie Goldberg has no eyebrows. Creepy.
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro I think I fell asleep in the movie, though.
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert Nope.
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry Another I’ve never heard of.
87
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom – Dear God, NO!
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle – Of course.
90 Imaginary Jesus -- Matt Mikalatos -- I love this book so much. It's the greatest. I laughed until I puked.
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad No. Go ahead, say that I suck. Say it!
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery – Nope.
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks I’ve read some Banks but not this one.
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams – Yup. Love books with rabbit prophets in them. This is the only one I know of that fits that description.
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole Started it. Several times. My friend Roland loves it. Me… not so much. I’m pretty slow to abandon a book but this one has been abandoned several times.
96 A Town Like
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas -- No. My sister loves this book, though. Loves it.
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare - Of course, of course. I do have a vivid memory of watching the Mel Gibson version (!) with my buddy Chris during high school and then beating each other up afterward.
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl - Dahl must be read. It's essential.
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo -- Yes, of course. And I know the soundtrack to the musical I have never seen. Go figure.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
A creepy story about my new HQ
I took A to my new office today so she could check it out. She went upstairs to the conference room and drew with markers. I asked her if she liked the new office or the old office better and she said the old office. When asked why she had no answer. A few minutes later she came down and told me she now had a reason she preferred the old office. Here is what she said:
Creepy, isn't it?
I was upstairs drawing and I finished with one marker so I put the cap back up and then I heard a sound like this... skritch! Skritch! Skritch!
It sounded like someone drawing. I thought someone was copying me. But there was no one there.
Creepy, isn't it?
Dolphins Vs. Pirates -- The Final Battle
A group of Somali pirates recently ran afoul of their old foe: DOLPHINS!
As you all know, dolphins and pirates have long hated one another. In fact, in the original draft of Peter Pan, Captain Hook's hand had been eaten by a dolphin with a clock in its stomach rather than a crocodile.
I'm glad to see that dolphins are picking up the pace in their never-ending war to rule the waves.
And, as always, the dolphins celebrated their victory by a giant under water hookah party:
As you all know, dolphins and pirates have long hated one another. In fact, in the original draft of Peter Pan, Captain Hook's hand had been eaten by a dolphin with a clock in its stomach rather than a crocodile.
I'm glad to see that dolphins are picking up the pace in their never-ending war to rule the waves.
And, as always, the dolphins celebrated their victory by a giant under water hookah party:
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
She's Never Even Seen the Movie
Yes, this is a picture of Z playing soccer. But as you can see from this photo (taken by my lovely wife), it's about time that my child perfect The Crane Technique. Her limbs are not straight enough. Perhaps the best way to teach her these things (besides watching the Karate Kid) is to give her common household chores that teach her karate.
"Yes, Z-san. Clean the toilet bowl with a sweeping, clockwise motion."
"Z-san, snatch up the books from the floor with a quick, decisive motion."
"Z-san, take these chopsticks and catch all the flies buzzing around in here."
I know, I know... some of you think this is evidence that I am trying to turn my poor daughters into martial art loving boys, but that's where you're wrong. I think it's time for you to go rent Karate Kid 3.
Signed,
Mr. Miyagi
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Resurrection Day
A great day today... a lot of fun with family and friends. We went to church and then met back at our house. Krista's brother and our nephew came, my sister and brother-in-law, our parents and Shasta. We had lamb for lunch and then spent time together. I had a lot of fun.
I re-read Flannery O'Connor's great short story A Good Man Is Hard To Find last night. It has an amazing scene toward the end (okay, every single word of this story is great... if you haven't read it I am pitying you right now. Pitying you. Go get it.) where The Misfit, a polite serial killer who has escaped from prison and come across a stranded family on vacation has a conversation with the grandmother about Jesus. A short bit from that section:
Our pastor's message this morning made me think of this, too... he spoke about how God prefers either white-hot passion or complete rejection from us, that this sort of mealy-mouthed indifference makes Him sick.
I was reminded of how Death is described as a lion in the wastelands, ravenous and eating up human lives by the handsful. But when Death came up against Jesus it had only the briefest victory before he kicked in its teeth. It makes perfect sense to me that a Person who could come back to life would be celebrated for the rest of the eternity. What doesn't make sense to me are the people who come to church just on Christmas and Easter... what is that all about? It seems to me that it's all or nothing, in or out. I don't understand the mild assent to Jesus... if He did what He said. I think I agree with The Misfit on that.
In any case, it's a good day to remember the Hope that is available in Jesus... that we need never truly die, and that He has given us proof of that in his own life, death and resurrection.
I re-read Flannery O'Connor's great short story A Good Man Is Hard To Find last night. It has an amazing scene toward the end (okay, every single word of this story is great... if you haven't read it I am pitying you right now. Pitying you. Go get it.) where The Misfit, a polite serial killer who has escaped from prison and come across a stranded family on vacation has a conversation with the grandmother about Jesus. A short bit from that section:
"Jesus was the only One that ever raised the dead." The Misfit continued, "and He shouldn't have done it. He thrown everything off balance. If He did what He said, then it's nothing for you to do but throw away everything and follow Him, and if He didn't, then it's nothing for you to do but enjoy the few minutes you got left the best way you can--by killing somebody or burning down down his house or doing some other meanness to him. No pleasure but meanness," he said and his voice had become almost a snarl.
Our pastor's message this morning made me think of this, too... he spoke about how God prefers either white-hot passion or complete rejection from us, that this sort of mealy-mouthed indifference makes Him sick.
I was reminded of how Death is described as a lion in the wastelands, ravenous and eating up human lives by the handsful. But when Death came up against Jesus it had only the briefest victory before he kicked in its teeth. It makes perfect sense to me that a Person who could come back to life would be celebrated for the rest of the eternity. What doesn't make sense to me are the people who come to church just on Christmas and Easter... what is that all about? It seems to me that it's all or nothing, in or out. I don't understand the mild assent to Jesus... if He did what He said. I think I agree with The Misfit on that.
In any case, it's a good day to remember the Hope that is available in Jesus... that we need never truly die, and that He has given us proof of that in his own life, death and resurrection.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Good, Great, Holy, Black Friday
Here's a little George Herbert for you:
I love Herbert's poems... this one is pretty straightforward compared to others of his, but I thought it was beautiful, nonetheless.
And now, in case you aren't sure what happens next: SPOILER ALERT.
Redemption
Having been tenant long to a rich Lord,
Not thriving, I resolved to be bold,
And make a suit unto him, to afford
A new small-rented lease, and cancel th' old.
Not thriving, I resolved to be bold,
And make a suit unto him, to afford
A new small-rented lease, and cancel th' old.
In heaven at his manour I him sought:
They told me there, that he was lately gone
About some land, which he had dearly bought
Long since on earth, to take possession.
I straight return'd, and knowing his great birth,
Sought him accordingly in great resorts;
In cities, theatres, gardens, parks, and courts:
At length I heard a ragged noise and mirth
Of thieves and murderers: there I him espied,
Who straight, Your suit is granted, said, and died.
I love Herbert's poems... this one is pretty straightforward compared to others of his, but I thought it was beautiful, nonetheless.
And now, in case you aren't sure what happens next: SPOILER ALERT.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)