Dolphins Vs. Pirates -- The Final Battle

A group of Somali pirates recently ran afoul of their old foe: DOLPHINS!

As you all know, dolphins and pirates have long hated one another. In fact, in the original draft of Peter Pan, Captain Hook's hand had been eaten by a dolphin with a clock in its stomach rather than a crocodile.

I'm glad to see that dolphins are picking up the pace in their never-ending war to rule the waves.

And, as always, the dolphins celebrated their victory by a giant under water hookah party:

Oh yeah, and I also fought this pirate

This guy kept getting in my face and giving me trouble during my time in Costa Rica. You can see that I started off by giving him a warning glare. He kept coming up to me and saying "Soy cual soy" and then he would laugh his strange little laugh.

So I popped him one, and he took a swing at me. I kept rotating to stay on his blind side and he kept throwing these wild punches. Then I knocked his hat off, and he pulled my cardigan down so that my arms were pinned and he kicked me over and over in the stomach, but then I used my powerful abs to grab onto his foot when he kicked me, and then I flexed my abs and he flew over backwards and into a table of diners.

I tore my arms out of my cardigan and then leapt up high into the air, smashing the table he had been lying on into splinters. Then he ran like a tiny mouse, and I stood upon the hill and shook my fist at him, crying out, "RUN TINY PIRATE, RUN! RETURN NOT UNTO MY RESTAURANT LEST YE PAY IN THY BLOOD!" I could hear him crying like a little baby.

The End.