Friday, July 29, 2011

Fasting Day Twenty-Five: culture shock

Am I meant to eat this?

I had this weird moment today when I passed Burgerville and saw the drive-through menu. I could see all the burgers arrayed in their glory and in a split-second I thought, "What would you do with those anyway? Why would you want them?” It had a feeling of culture shock. I had this realization that there's something everyone else is doing that I’m not and, at least at this moment, it didn't make sense to me.

For me, food has become fruit juice, I guess. Today I drank some weird tasting white grape juice. I suspect it’s actually white/peach/mango juice that had been mislabeled. I wasn't sure, though, so I poured it out and went to drink some apple juice I've left in the pantry to keep it at room temperature (I don't like drinking things cold right now... I'm cold enough already). But the apple juice had molded. Disgusting. And I think I drank some yesterday. 

At church tonight Pastor Jim told Krista that pretty soon I would need a walker. He was joking (I think) and saying that I look weak and tired. I asked Krista if that's true, wondering if I'm starting to look really bad... last time I fasted for a longer period people were really concerned for me by the end. But she said I look great compared to that time, so I'm not too worried.

At dinner tonight, Krista apologized for talking about all the different times in the day when she’s hungry… I told her that I'm not hungry anyway, and I realize that it's true. I'm hungrier when I'm eating than when I'm fasting.