Cat Arrested in South America for daring prison break attempt

You may have already heard about the recent incident where a kitty tried to break some people out of prison by packing in some files, a cell phone and so on. This "do it yourself" prison break kit was duct taped onto the cat.

Here's a video of the cat getting strip searched:



If that cat could speak, I'm 95% certain we would hear several of the following comments:

1) PLEASE DON'T USE DUCT TAPE when you put that stuff on me. Please!

2) Everyone keeps saying I can't talk. Did it ever occur to you that maybe I refuse to talk? Because I'm a tough guy? Because I'm not a stool pigeon? HUH? EVER THINK OF THAT?

3) Why do you keep calling me a "white cat"? That's racial profiling, man.

4) I don't understand. This totally worked last time.

I'm not sure what else the cat might say. What do you think?