Why I Don't Care About the News

The 24 hour cycling of constant news need not be full of nonsensical and constant retreading of unimportant information. They could, for instance, do in-depth reporting on actually important things.

Today, I'm living in a hotel in Florida. I walked by two televisions, both on mute, one showing CNN and the other showing FOX news.

Here were the breaking headlines, which, admittedly, I only saw the ticker tape for:

On CNN: Rick Santorum believes in good and evil.

On FOX: Student's homemade lunch confiscated by school officials.

Really, news people? And you wonder why I prefer the Colbert Report?

If you want the context of these BURNING ISSUES THAT YOU MUST KNOW MORE ABOUT, here's CNN about Santorum. Where it turns out that not only does he believe in good and evil, he actually believes in Satan. Wow. Thanks for the tip, CNN. In other news, I hope that you cover "Matt Mikalatos deeply concerned about CNN being deeply concerned that a public figure believes in good and evil." I'd hate for them to, I don't know, denounce the Holocaust or something.

I couldn't find a video clip from whatever show Fox was showing (I'm sure it will surface eventually), but here's the kind of quality reporting coming on this issue. And here's a response from the school officials on what happened, which didn't appear to be part of the Fox coverage, apparently because it doesn't fit in with their preferred way of looking at things.

And, lastly, in other news, I'm a little cranky today, which makes me say what I'm thinking instead of being diplomatic.

Now, to make myself feel better, I will look for actual news that people should care about. Like this escaped emu. Thank you, MSNBC.


How is any of this more important than Colbert's report on Ultimate Taser Ball? I don't know:

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Current Events - Ultimate Taser Ball
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog Video Archive