People who wink at wrong cause trouble,
but a bold reproof promotes peace.
Do you just hate it when a guy blasts the music too loud when you’re in his car? Or when a girl can’t seem to tear herself away from her cell phone long enough to say hello? Maybe you’d never date someone who has a tattoo, doesn’t laugh at your jokes, or has a lot of baggage from a previous relationship—beliefs we’re not willing to compromise. But what does the Bible say our deal breakers should be?
Same spiritual beliefs. “Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?” (Amos 3:3). If a couple’s beliefs are lopsided or unequal, they will never be able to grow together. Similarly, Paul warns us not to “team up with those who are unbelievers” (2Corinthians 6:14).
Accepts authority. The Roman officer whose story is told in two gospels had soldiers and slaves under his authority. He was a powerful man, and yet he accepted Christ’s authority (Matthew 8:5-13). Does your date accept the roles God gave all of us? Does he respect those in authority? Does she accept God’s authority over her life?
Hygiene habits. This isn’t about how often your date flosses or what kind of deodorant he wears. It’s about the state of his heart. Does he or she care more about the outward appearance than the inside? Beauty only scratches the surface of the skin. If your date’s daily spiritual habits are as regular as a shower, you’ll be able to see the fruit in his daily life.
Financially free. Can your date manage his or her pocketbook? Did she spend her rent money on a new pair of shoes? Did he blow his next paycheck on the latest GPS? Scripture tells us to “Give to everyone what you owe them: Pay your taxes and government fees to those who collect them…Owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another” (Romans 13:7-8).
All our deal breakers are different. Some of them won’t really matter in the long run (he’ll probably turn down his stereo when he has a baby in the backseat!), but don’t compromise on a life partner whose heart isn’t full of Christ.
Adapted from: Not Another Dating Book © 2012 by Renee Fisher. Published by Harvest House Publishers, Eugene, OR. Used by permission.