Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Ridiculous Reviewers on Amazon: One star reviews for Eric Carle's The Very Hungry Caterpillar

If you're like me, Eric Carle painted paper animals into your childhood. I always liked the very hungry caterpillar, who ate his way through leaves, apples, pie, pizza, ice cream and so on before spinning a cocoon and becoming a butterfly. One of the things that interested me most was the fact that each page had a small hole in it for the caterpillar to go through. I always thought that was neat.

BUT NOT NEAT ENOUGH TO PREVENT ONE STAR REVIEWS ON AMAZON!

That's right kids, it's time for Ridiculous One Star Reviews of Eric Carle's The Very Hungry Caterpillar !



First, a one star review from Libby O'Connor of Borneo! She has this to say:

A beautifully illustrated book based on poor scientific knowledge. Butterflies do not come from cocoons - moths do. When butterfly caterpillars pupate, they do not spin silk to make a cocoon. If you want your child to learn inaccurate science, use this book with them.


Great point, Libby! Another scientific inaccuracy: Caterpillars don't eat hot dogs! They have more than six feet (or less than six feet? Do they have feet?)! They don't have green eyes! Or noses? It's like this book isn't even designed to be a science text! RIDICULOUS! MY CHILDREN SHALL NEVER SEE THIS! I suppose they'll have to be satisfied with the Darwin's Origin of the Species pop up book I bought for them.

Whew. I can see Libby's point. Let's move on to S. Dragun of the good old U.S.A. and see what he has to say!

With "a Very Hungry Caterpillar", I was expecting something alot more grand given all the raving reviews and positive aggregate. 
What I got instead was a book that failed to satisfy any of the senses or tastes of the refined individual. 
The plot was much too simplistic, and offered nothing to those looking forward to a daring plot on metamorphic themes and evolution between various stages of life. instead, the writing style was atrocious, most likely to appeal to a sophomoric audience, and the novel began as soon as it ended. 
As far as the illustrations, they seem to be little more than paper mache and have no real skill or artistic merit. I have seen better drawings from a child, and drawings that carried more of a better synthesis between plot and picture. 
If you are a more mature reader and are actually looking for a decent work of fiction, I highly recommend Franz Kafka's Metamorphosis.


Ha ha ha ha haaaaa! Nice one! S. Dragun, I like you. I suppose next week will have to be one star reviews of Kafka's Metamorphosis. Which, I think Libby would like to point out, is not a scientifically accurate description of cockroaches or Russia.


And now, our last review, slightly edited to make it family friendly for all those families who like to sit around the breakfast table, reading my blog aloud over the roar of Rice Krispies. This one comes from the infamous "A Customer." 


This book has to be one of the greatest sagas ever told, the story of a caterpillar who eats his way to becoming a beautiful butterfly. I think it's a story we can all relate to. 
I'm going to give it one star anyway because I just stubbed my toe really hard and d*** it, I blame this book.


I'm giving a one star review to every book in my house. Especially the ones in my kids' room. 


Alright, everyone, that brings us to the end of another week's Ridiculous Reviews on Amazon. If you're still hungry for more, feel free to chomp your way right through a whole series of Ridiculous Reviews! 

6 comments:

  1. The second one has GOT to be deliberate, to attract attention for whatever reason. Although I would go with the recommendation. I'm sure that when I was at the picture book stage, I'd have LOVED Kafka's Metamorphosis. I was weird that way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree. The last two are self-consciously funny, which is a nice change of pace in the One Star world.

      Delete
  2. "What I got instead was a book that failed to satisfy any of the senses or tastes of the refined individual. " -- hysterical.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Amazing that people would write this . . .

    I've awarded you the Kreativ Blogger award, which will be posted on my site in the morning. Not sure if you're "into" this kind of thing - but I love people to read you! You're great!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Aha! At last you feature a book that I would give a one-star review to! I never liked that book as a kid. Or any Eric Carle books. I still don't like them.

    It certainly has its own style and voice. I just find it completely unappealing. I resent its enduring popularity. And that's how I feel about the song "Mack the Knife," too.

    It feels so good to say that. Even if it does put me in the same category as the crazies on Amazon.

    ReplyDelete
  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete