Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Ridiculous Reviewers On Amazon: One Star Review for Green Eggs and Ham

Green Eggs and Ham (I Can Read It All by Myself Beginner Books)If you've been a kid, chances are good that you've read Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss. If you have a kid, you may have the entire book memorized. I think we all know what it's about... a ridiculous story of a guy who won't try green eggs and ham, who is mercilessly harassed by another guy to try them until he does and (SPOILER) he likes them. It's funny, surreal, ridiculous and entertaining.

But of course that won't stop some cranky Amazon reviewer from hating it and giving it a one star review. Here are my two favorites:

Numero Uno, from "A Kid" has this to say:

I dont like Dr.Suess books because they bore the heack out of me. The illistrations were lame,but after a while of constantly staring at them in discust, they were just really funny. Because they were funny,I gave them 2 stars.

Looks like somebody needs to read more Dr. Seuss books to learn how to spell. A counting book may also be in order, since he said he gave it two stars but actually only gave it one.

And, secondly, a classic review from A Customer, who titled his review, "An asinine, boring book."

This book is SOOOOOOOO annoying! What's the deal with all the rhyming? That got on my last nerve. I can't believe this book is a children's "classic". This book does for childrens' books what Jim Jones did for children's drinks (kool-aid, that is). If you want a GREAT children's book, try "Atlas Shrugged" the pop-up book by Ayn Rand.
Okay... the book is annoying, it rhymes and is boring. Hmmm. Then he compares it to deadly Kool Aid. Then he says that everyone should read a pop-up book of Ayn Rand's Objectivist screed, "Atlas Shrugged." I couldn't believe that such a book exists, so I looked it up and... as near as I can tell it doesn't exist. I suppose it's a joke. But from what I hear, if you want to be bored and annoyed you could look up the first part of the movie adaptation of Atlas Shrugged.