Monday, August 10, 2009

Return of the Mormons

My neighbor across the street, Derek, was standing out on his porch talking to the new Mormon missionaries assigned to our neighborhood. After a while I decided to wander over and say hello. I learned a few things (like when you're excommunicated from the LDS church you can still go to services but you're not allowed to pay tithes... weird). I asked about the second heaven that's so great that if we could see it now we'd kill ourselves to go there... and so long as you've been a good person that's where you get to go. One of the guys said, "Well, that's not really true, that rumor gets around but that's not really true." I told him that the person who told me that was the last missionary assigned to the neighborhood and he said, "Well, it's true but widely misunderstood." Oh.

The most special moment was as everyone was getting ready to leave Derek said, "Matt's an author." And then a minute later he said, "Tell them the name of your book, Matt."

Me: "Imaginary Jesus."

And then there was a long, awkward pause. Then I explained that it wasn't a book against Jesus.

Mormons: You should come to our church for services sometime.